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Museums, Marathons and Three Bottles of Wine

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Last Friday saw my little family packing up to head to Washington D.C. to visit with my brother and his family. You might remember him. I’ve mentioned him once or twice.

The entire experience of getting to know my brother and his family has been nothing short of amazing. Not only did I get to have the older brother I’ve always wanted, I have the most kick ass sister in law EVER. I will get there in a minute…

My brother lives right outside of D.C., which is about a 4 and a half hour drive from where we live in Pittsburgh. Add 45 minutes for a surly 16 year old, and an entire hour for the 18 month old who got car sick and barfed all over himself not once, but twice. (SIDENOTE: Say what you will about Country Folk, while we were pulled over on the side of the road cleaning off a barfy toddler, one and only one person stopped to help us – a good old boy from West By God Virginia. They may vote wrong, but they were raised right).

Anyway! We get there Friday evening and we have a fabulous cookout, the kids play, the adults chat and drink, the 16 year old text messages girls and wishes he was with people his own age. It was fabulous. Saturday dawns, we have breakfast and decide to take all of the kids on to the Metro and into D.C. for a trip to the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History.

Let me repeat key facts: ALL OF THE KIDS. SMITHSONIAN. D.C. NO BOOZE.

Listen. If you ever want to take two toddlers, a four year old, a 16 year old and four adults to a Smithsonian Museum on the very first day of Cherry Blossom Festival in our nation’s capitol, let me save you the trouble. To simulate this experience, take your left leg, saw it off, with a butter knife. You’re welcome.

Sure, they look like they're having fun, but right after I took this Casey flung Jones into a group of Japanese tourists.

It’s not that it wasn’t fun, it’s that I actually LIKE museums. I’m nerdy that way. But this place was so crowded that I actually for a minute thought that I had accidentally ran into New Orleans at Mardi Gras but with way more double strollers and no boobs.

We  head back to Mike and Katie’s house. Mike decides to take a nap. Casey decides to go watch the NCAA Tourney. Bethany and Katie decide to start drinking wine. Have I mentioned I love my sister in law? (SIDENOTE: Casey and I have a bet on this year’s NCAA Tourney, based on who can beat who in our brackets. Winner gets to pick loser’s next tat. And GUESS WHO IS WINNING??)

Katie and I kick back and polish off two bottles of Yellow Tail Merlot. Finally the guys come to check on us, and we are saying cocksucker in front of the kids drunk. It happens. The nanny shows up to babysit the little ones, and the four adults and Kyle head off to dinner at one of Mike and Katie’s favorite local eats, Evening Star.

I have to stop right here and say how proud I was/am of my Kyle. 16 is a very hard age to be. You are in that weird space between child and adult. But he lives in that space so well. He is smart and funny and he makes me proud. We had a great time at dinner. I’m sure the three bottles of Snake Charmer Shiraz didn’t hurt, either.

The next morning, wine hangover or no, I had to run 10 miles. My brother, ever the trooper, decided that he was going to make the journey with me. But not running. Oh no, that is for maniacs and military types. He was going to bike next to me while I ran my ten.

Me and my bro on our ten mile trek. I loved every single mile. : ) Well, except the last one. That mile can suck it.

And so we did. I ran, he biked. And together we did ten miles. And hopefully that’s enough to get me through my first half marathon, which is on SATURDAY. As in, the day after tomorrow.

Basically, the next time I blog, I will be a half marathon vet. Because I WILL finish. I will. I will finish and I will win the NCAA Tourney and Casey will be getting a big ol’ I HEART BETHANY tattoo on his backside.

Yours in about to go for a long run,



7 responses »

  1. A 10-miler is perfectly acceptable to be ready for your first half-mary…rest tomorrow so your legs are chomping at the bit (that’s an odd visual) for Saturday AM.

    You are gonna whip that race’s ass and make it cry Uncle!

  2. I totally only ran 10 miles before my first half. So you’re right on par.

    You’ll totally be waiting for me at the finish 😉


    I used to live in DC, many moons ago, and just laughed thinking of the insanity you were in while there!!!! Nice place to visit while drinking!!! GREAT LUCK on Saturday for your run, your going to rock it out.

  4. Your nieces will be cheering you on in spirit. Clare has been talking about how she wants to bring all the girls in her preschool class to be your cheerleaders! You’re going to do great! We’re so proud of you!

  5. My mom and I made the mistake of going to dc at the same time 2 years ago. Omg. I would have sold my soul for a place to sit and food. There was only eel or octopus at the stands…we saw nothing but the cherry blossoms surrounded by sooooooo many people. I can’t imagine going with kids….I had enough trouble hangin n to my mom.

  6. I hear you were behind Cassie during the marathon. I saw her ass in person once, so you know, big thumbs up for both of you on that, but also–congratulations on starting your first half-marathon! I assume you finished, but since you didn’t blog about it today, you might be dead, and I therefore won’t congratulate you on that yet.

  7. We went one year and thought we were seeing the cherry blossoms, only to find out that they had died out two weeks prior. We were looking at dogwood blossoms, or some such ghetto equivalent. Whatever. Little white flowers. BFD.


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