AMPFUSHAH. I’m Making it a Thing

Reflecting on 2012, I have so much to be grateful for.

My children, who I love more than anything and who make me so happy and proud to be their mom. Usually. Sometimes I want to pretend they’re not mine.

Jones and Kyle, playing Jones’ favorite new game, I kick you in you face.

Casey. I found someone who loves me for exactly who I am, yet has managed to make me a better person. By not trying to change me, he’s changed me. And almost always for good.

My health. As some people very dear to me struggle with their own health challenges, I am overwhelming lucky to be in the shape I am today. Especially when you look at the years of abuse I have heaped upon myself.

My job. In today’s tumultuous economy, I am beyond grateful to have my job, doing something I absolutely love, with a pretty amazing group of people.

Some amazing coworkers, who also happen to fall into the friend category.

My family. Yes, most of them are insane, but they are MY crazy family and I love them.

Casey’s family. Yes, most of them are insane, but see above.

My friends. I am so happy to have some of the strongest, beautiful, kindest women in the world as my friends. Every day I am reminded of their compassion, their humor, their support and their faith in my crazy ass. I love them, and they know who they are (yes, even you!).

This is just a sampling of my wonderful friends. If I had to put pictures of all of them, this post would be very, very, very long.

And 2012 had some lifetime memory moments.

My first half marathon.

My first Tough Mudder.

This could also be filed under my great friends and Casey’s great family grateful lists.

My second half marathon.

This could also be filed under friends, because I wouldn’t have completed it without my friend, Megan. Also my amazing family, as my mom, Casey and Jones all cheered me on.

My first duathlon.

Cross reference this with friends and job, as Liz is a dear friend who I happen to work with.

My first Warrior Dash.

I ain’t scurred of dirt.

Our family trip to Aruba.

I got an iPhone.

You can take lots of cool pictures of yourself with a front facing camera! You’re welcome, Facebook friends!

So ya, 2012 was pretty bad ass. How, may you ask, is 2013 going to top this? I will tell you. I have a plan. A Master Plan for Ultimate Success, Health and Happiness in 2013, or AMPFUSHAH for short. And what’s in your AMPFUSHAH, Bethany? You know, I really like you guys. You ask good questions.

I can’t tell you. That’s right; it’s a secret. I am not yet ready to unveil my AMPFUSHAH. I can share with you some essential elements:

If I achieve full on AMPFUSHAHication, the end of 2013 will be completely different than the end of this year. COMPLETLEY. (For those of you thinking gender reassignment surgery, you’re wrong. Clever, but wrong)

I am not wasting a single day of 2013. Not a one. I have something to do every day to achieve AMPFUSHAH nirvana. Because that’s what it takes to achieve a goal – a daily dedication to the cause. And my cause is worth it.

It includes my whole family, not just me. This isn’t just MY AMPFUSHAH (well, parts of it are), it’s where we all want to be when we’re looking to ring in 2014.

What I can do is share with you goals as they are achieved. Not my every day goals, because let’s face it, that would be boring. But the bigger ones. Medium and above. Maybe some of the pieces will start to paint a picture of the whole, and maybe I’ll have a prize if someone can figure out AMPFUSHAH before November (at which point it should be either glaringly obvious, or I will have given up and pretended that my AMPFUSHAH was nothing more than the desire to have a really different hair cut).

So bring it, 2013. BRING IT WITH ALL YOU GOT, cause I have a list, AMPFUSHAH, determination, and a history of getting what I want. This is going to be fun.

Yours in Getting it Done,

Bethany

ERMEGERD, ZERMBIES!

Fine. I admit it. I’ve been a terrible blogger lately. I’ve been ignoring you, and I wouldn’t blame you for one minute if you were mad at me.

Are you mad at me? I hate it when people are mad at me. Work has been crazy, I’ve been traveling, and to be honest, I haven’t been running much so I’ve been hiding from you so you won’t judge me. I don’t want to change the name of my blog to Just Plain Old Drinking Wine, but I may have to.

I still totally love you and think that you’re pretty/handsome/have lost weight/look great with the haircut.

How about a peace offering. So I said work has been crazy, and it has been. Crazy busy, crazy traveling, and crazy   they let me make a zombie video crazy. They let me and our social media manager write a series of four consumer education videos on Energy Zombies, then they let us hire a production company to make said videos. We casted internally, so the zombies are all employees and they did an AMAZING job.

We are releasing one a week for the next four weeks, and this one launched on Friday. So sit back, grab some popcorn… or grab some popcorn and then sit back, and enjoy the show. I will share another one this Friday, and in the meantime, I will try to come up with some hilarious yet uplifting post to share with you.

Until then, your in ZOMBIES!

Bethany

Greetings from Kentucky!

I am coming to you live from right outside of Lexington, KY – home of bluegrass, the UK Wildcats, a bazillion horse farms, and Casey’s mom and stepdad.

We are here for a family reunion, such as we are. Jim, Casey’s stepdad, has two sons, one of whom is married. They all live in North Carolina, and we came in from Pittsburgh, and Casey’s mom, Peg, almost exploded with delight.

There are two things in the world that send Peg into the realm of happiness where glitter and rainbows come shooting out of her eye sockets: her family and having visitors.

Blood, Sweat, Tears and Pee; The Pittsburgh Half Marathon – A Love Letter

Here we are all bibbed up and ready to go!!

I’m going to start off with a quote from my mother: “If someone told me five years ago that Bethany would be running a half marathon, I would have peed myself laughing.”

Funny story. While running the half marathon I actually did pee myself. But not from laughing. And not even a lot. Just a wee bit. Basically enough to make it look like I had a glandular problem. But I’m getting ahead of myself. This story really starts on Christmas morning, 2011.

In Which I Ask You to Give Me Money

And by me, I mean the Western Pennsylvania Humane Society. As you may know (because I have mentioned it roughly 5,ooo times) I am running the Pittsburgh Half Marathon this Sunday. I picked the Humane Society as my charity for a few reasons.

1.) I love animals.

2.) They receive ZERO government funding. That means the only way they can help animals is with YOUR assistance.

3.) Until I buy my farm so I can adopt 27 rescue dogs, this will have to do.

4.) The voices told me to.

If you are in a position to give just a few dollars, it would really make a difference. I won’t ask you for money for anything else, I promise.

Also, the person who raises the most wins a cruise to the Caribbean. If that’s me, I will pick one of my donors at random and take them with me. A cruise with me! How fun is that? Super fun!

Click here to give.

I hope you can help.

Yours in no more serious posts for awhile I promise,

Bethany

Duct Tape and Death Waivers, An Epic Tale of Tough Mudders

Perhaps you thought after reading this tale

that on our Tough Mudder we would not prevail.

And you would be wrong, so pull up a chair.

I will start from the end and tell how we got there.

Back to Basics

You're just going to have to trust me on this - that hill is a beast. I should have taken the picture from the bottom looking up, but, you know, I was running.

There is a hill near my house, Cochran Road. It’s been my nemesis since I started running. It’s long, it’s steep, and there aren’t any traffic lights to break it up. You can either run it or you can’t. And for me, it was always ‘can’t’. Until today.

How to NOT train for the ‘Toughest Event on the Planet’, a cautionary tale.

I only know how to do things one way: Super freaking awesomely.

When I do laundry? It’s awesome. Dishes? Frigging glitter clouds float by. Showering? Unicorns soap me up. So when I had to prepare myself for my very first Tough Mudder, I had only one requirement, make it awesome.

While some people were training by running ten miles or so, I was doing my version of that. I was Botoxing the entire upper portion of my face. Other Mudders were pumping iron. I was getting my highlights done. And the crucial day before the event, when athletes are preparing their bodies for the grueling tasks before them, Casey and I were going on a ten hour drinking binge through Vermilion, Ohio.

SSSHHH. I'm training.

It all started out innocently enough. Casey had seen a winery ad and asked me if I wanted to go check it out. Well of course I do. I am a living, breathing human person, aren’t I? We had no kids and it was raining and we were in a strange town, so yes. At the time, going to a winery for lunch seemed like a good idea.

CALL CNN, I RAN A HALF MARATHON

As some of you may know, I ran my first half marathon last week. *pauses to accept applause and accolades*

How was it, you ask? Oh, it was amazing! It wasn’t hard at all. I breezed right through it, crossed the finish line and then prepared a five course lunch for me and my friends.

HAHAHA. Just kidding. It was terrible. It was brutal. I almost gave up. At one point, I cried. It was soul crushing, painful to just move agony that went on for over two hours.  And I can’t wait to do it again.

Lemme explain.

Museums, Marathons and Three Bottles of Wine

Last Friday saw my little family packing up to head to Washington D.C. to visit with my brother and his family. You might remember him. I’ve mentioned him once or twice.

The entire experience of getting to know my brother and his family has been nothing short of amazing. Not only did I get to have the older brother I’ve always wanted, I have the most kick ass sister in law EVER. I will get there in a minute…